Leading from the Heart: An Introduction

I imagine that most of you like the sound of leading from the heart and agree with the idea. In a post-modern culture, dominated by Oprah-endorsed spirituality and post-feminist appreciation of emotional intelligence (even Donald Trump cries now), we react favorable, nod our heads, and completely agree. Ideas of emotion, heart, depth, and interiority are now a part of our popular culture.

A top level executive at a national corporation recently told me that in hiring other executives, emotional development is looked at and is now considered to be equally important as an MBA. Yes, you read that correctly, emotional intelligence is equally important as an MBA. Unfortunately, no one is giving out degrees in emotional aptitude.

You might be interested to know, when I asked said executive if I could quote him, he looked at me and said, “Are you f&cking kidding me?” Apparently, I could not quote him on that.

When it comes to the real world, the contemporary real world, ideas like emotional intelligence and leading from the heart sound nice. However, more and more, I am seeing that it’s most often limited to the space of another good, contemporary idea along with ideas like "being green." (When was the last time you rode your bike to work?)

Ideas about emotions are not emotions. Liking emotional intelligence is not emotional intelligence.

Last week in a coaching session with someone currently involved in huge upper level management conflict I asked, “how do you think they feel?” And the answer was, “how is that going to help me?” I generally expect responses like this, but every once in awhile they do catch me off guard. Is the best the adult world has to offer iterations of playground memories?

We need to do better.

“Have you ever listened to someone from the inside?” Jeremy (“Powder”) asks Lindsey in the film Powder. This is where leading from the heart begins.

I write with awareness that this is a huge subject with infinite implications – implications of great impact. (I just went back to the title and added: An Introduction). This is the first of a series of undetermined parts.

Leading from the heart begins with listening to yourself and others from the inside. Listening to yourself creates a much greater matrix of information and intelligence – you can access more wisdom, intuition, and knowledge. Listening to others from the inside means considering how they feel and what their experience is; considering what their perspective is; considering what their motivations are. And that’s just the beginning. This leads to feeling them from the inside. Being present to the way the space feels, how they appear in their skin, their receptivity and experience. Being this open to someone allows you to listen fully. In listening deeply you can communicate more effectively.

You might wonder how this helps you. In resourcing anecdotal evidence of project failure, deal breakdowns, and organization struggle, miscommunication and conflict soar above all other problems. If you want to be successful, if you want to change the world you need a smart heart, and you need to lead from it.

Stay posted for more blogs on Leading from the Heart – there are a lot more to come.